OH YEAH, DOM HOWARD

Forget lead signers. Now that Mr. Bellamy’s made baby Bing love with Kate Hudson, and therefore become part of the golden gang of HW (and y’know, given the slowly dying state of the West, there’ll be some sort of statistic to verify how we all need to spend less time on the most marketable and highest paid member of a band, and more time on the hotties a la derriere. And their derrieres.) – it’s time to focus. Time to focus on who (we’re at least told, irregardless of rumours that link him romantically to a famous lady London stylist) is the most eligible bachelor in the magniloquent lands of MUSE.

Female and male Musers alike understand the appeal behind Mr Howard. In the early years, his appeal was primarily assumed by his ever-changing hairdo, *that* “sit the fuck down” moment and an unabashedly public bromance with Bellamy himself; all of which lead to the most masturbatory tales of fanfic between the two all over the interwebs as well the various Gmail chat histories that formulate the virtual memories of many, many 17 year-olds. Dominic Howard probably, single handedly, proliferated the use of the word “hawt”.

In later years (Let’s say, BH&R to now), the Dominic Howard appeal factor meteorically rose. Like any modern era that’s threatened with economic breakdown and apocalypse, the natural reaction of culture is to go WELL over the top to make up for the anxiety. Dom, therefore, became somewhat zeitgeisty in the year 2010, and right through 2011 to become OVERLORD OF HILARIOUS AND WEIRD OUTFITS. Observe:

IF GAGA WAS A MAN

Dom Howard is kinda like the secret boss of Muse. Not the bawss – but, the boss of cool and nerdism: and therefore, cool. With a wardrobe comprising colourful skinny jeans and graphic print tees, he represents a hybrid of Blink 182 fan, a graphic designer and… like, a hardcore Tumblr dude who’s proper good at playing drums.

Incidentally, he is also the subject of many dedicated Tumblr users.

Observe, some of the best sites around:

http://fuckyeahdomininchoward.tumblr.com

http://fuckyeahdom.tumblr.com 

Such hardcore Musers are handy: especially so when you need a cult following for your star-studded, infinitely gorgeous side-project.

VICKY CRYER

Anyway ladies (and gents.) As if all of those weren’t reasons enough to fancy the luminous pants off the Howard, here we go: the top ten reasons why everybody lurvves Dom Howard.

 TOP TEN!

10. The POUT. If you’ve been to a Muse show, you’ll know it. You’ve seen it. You know when it will happen. Starlight, Space Dementia (if you’re lucky enough to’ve seen that) and Knights. It’s all about the POUT of concentration. And it’s probably what keeps that face so taut and perky.

9. NOMNOMNOM. HE’S THE FOODIE. Actually, he’s the one who really likes brie cheese. As any Muser will tell you,

SELF PROCLAIMED ARSEHOLE (see Muse Drums.co.uk)

this fact is always within the top five facts that’s most memorable and cute about Mr Howard. From this, all assume he is a foodie.

8. Irrepressible groupie-lover. Probably. BUT THAT’S ROCK N ROLL BITCHES! See, all these leaked photos of Sheenism/hedonism combine to create an easily-accessible album for the voyeurs…and it makes the ladies reckon they’ve got a chance. Which, let’s face it, they probably have. Most Muse fans average at an 8 out of 10 for attractiveness, so all’s good.

7. THE JOKER. (also see: bromance, the one making everyone else giggle.)

6. ALWAYS TRYIN’ NEW THINGS…

5. …LIKE PINK SHIRTS (see http://fuckyeahdom.tumblr.com), and VIBRAPHONES

4.  HE’S A BIT OF A GOOFBALL.

3. He’s WELL NICE to fans. Probably not as angelic as Chris. But then, there’s never been a story circulating around the inner inner inner threads of forums of a snub. Always a good thing.

2. DH is always the one with a SMILE on his face! There’s nothing better than the band member who, upon reaching the life of megastardom, reacts in the way we all would: ABSO-CHUFFING LOVING EVERY SECOND. This trait is also what is known in the biz as ‘gratitude.’

1. HE’S ACTUALLY A REALLY GOOD FLIPPIN’ DRUMMER, KIDS. That he most certainly is. The site Muse Drums helpfully informs us that his influences are primarily jazz – arguably, the genre from which rockin-and-a-rollin was born.

Voila. Sexy-ass Donald. YEAH, DONALD!

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