WHEN A VEGAN MET GAGA

The post-VMAs interview

IN AMERICA, The Ellen DeGeneres Show is a talk show which rules cable sets everywhere. A primetime staple and syndicated to hundreds of channels across the US, it counts its peers as Oprah, Letterman, Jimmy Kimmel, Rosie O’Donnell and Jimmy Fallon.

(c) Warner Bros.

The show is normally called ‘Ellen’ for short. She is a charismatic and funny presenter with a legacy of sitcoms she’s starred in – perhaps this is what inspired her now-famous cheeky dance routine, which she does with the audience at the beginning of every show.

Some features include her giving amazing things away to viewers for Twelve Days, like mahoosive flat screen TVs and holidays. It’s kind of Jonny Ross (RIP Friday Night With, you are sorely missed) meets Oprah, Paul O’Grady and The Generation Game, only cutting out the Jim Davidson BS that came with The Generation Game.

(c) Getty

Ellen is so good, the producers know it’s going to be on air through to at least 2014, so screw Armageddon/ whatever that 2012 prediction is meant to be banging on about. Plus, Ellen was one of the first shows in the world to be broadcast completely in HD.

In a word: trailblazing. It doesn’t really mean to be either, but note that newer talk shows model themselves off her format.

This season’s premiere featured a post-VMAs interview with Lady GaGa – and post-THAT Franc Fernadez MEAT DRESS. Just in case you live in a cave (I doubt it but it’s an excuse to put the picture in), avoid the glossies or maybe you have taken a philistine’s oath against the pop star:

(c) Getty. She accepted the Video of the Year award for Bad Romance in this outfit

Ellen herself is vegan and so asked GaGa in a most diplomatic manner: “What is the purpose of the meat?”

“Well, it’s certainly no disrespect to anyone that’s vegan or vegetarian,” said Lady GaGa.

PETA(People for Ethical Treatment of Animals) had already responded to the event with an official statement:

“What’s next: the family cat made into a hat?”

It is hard to tell the difference between rhetoric and encouragement they may have given GaGa in this sentence.

In response to Ellen, the Poker Face star produced, perhaps, the first expected answer, last.

“As you know, I am the most judgment-free human being on Earth.

“However, it has many interpretations — but for me this evening it’s that if we don’t stand up for what we believe in, if we don’t fight for our rights, pretty soon we’re gonna have as much rights as the meat on our bones.

“And… [Lady GaGa then holds up a copy of Vogue Japan, where she appeared in a real meat bikini on the cover]

…I am not a piece of meat.”

(c) Getty

Following a stutter and then a blast of applause, Ellen gave GaGa something more cruciferous.

A kale bikini.

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